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12 ways to overdo it for your lover

The 'Reasoning' Behind Affairs
How to Prevent your Partner from Straying

by Angela Darling

  Although most of us can agree that affairs are not a desirable thing it is the norm in Western society as opposed to the exception. Why it is being reported that over 60% of relationships are considered dysfunctional after only 1 year, and why more than 50% of marriages are ending in separation, are the sort of questions many of us would like clear answers to. Theories include the habits of our ancestors, modern lifestyle, degradation of family values, working women, confusion of roles for both men and women, economics, and more. The simple fact is that there are no simple answers.

  Couples receive a lot of pressure to perform at work, in the home, and in their relationships. There is often little time dedicated to healthy forms of communication and time spent being 'together' in an environment that doesn't have distractions including TV, music, reading, other people, etc.

   There are some proven methods to help keep your partner from straying off with another:

  • Work hard on the lines of communication between you.
  • Take the time to understand one another. Good understanding makes good friends.
  • Be honest with each other about what you need and don't like. Don't wait to be angry or until it's too late to tell your partner what bothers you.
  • Take time to be alone together in a quiet private space, without distractions or friends.
  • Set aside time for talking, time for affection, and time for sex. These are different activities, especially for women. It is important that each receive their needed attention.
  • Go the library and read books on the area you wish your partner to improve on. The best way to help someone improve is to improve yourself. Also, it is important to remember that the vast majority of people in relationships had only one example of how it works, their parents. Most of us were never taught how to love, how to make love, how to communicate, how to listen, and so forth. Reading books on these topics not only helps improve our level of skill, it also lets us know that we are not alone and that others have overcome obstacles that may seem insurmountable to us at the outset.

  It is always difficult to comprise a 'Top' list for anything and this is no exception. The order of the reasons why people have affairs can always be debated but this certainly does include some of the most popular reasons. This list is based on popular studies as well as some of our own Astro polls and questionnaires. After reading these, click on the poll result link to read the results of the most recent Top Reasons for Affairs Astropoll.

Top 7 Reasons Men Have Affairs

  1. Opportunity - Meets someone new, she's irresistible, and he believes he wont get caught.
  2. Unhappy – His partner is no longer motivated to please him, or just doesn't turn him on.
  3. Self Esteem - Finds that he is more desirable to another woman and feels more appreciated.
  4. More Sex - Accepts that his partner has different needs but he wants sex more often.
  5. Variety - Satisfies his wish to have sex with different partners.
  6. Partner Unavailable - He and his partner are apart on a regular basis or for an extended period of time.
  7. Aging - Feels time running out and another partner helps to dispel that fear.

Top 7 Reasons Women Have Affairs

  1. Opportunity - Meets someone new who satisfies a longing or preference.
  2. Self-esteem - She finds a new partner who satisfies her need to feel wonderful about herself, and her sexuality.
  3. Loneliness - She doesn't have that special friendship with her partner, or they aren’t alone together often enough. She needs someone to really communicate with.
  4. Personal Growth - Her needs have changed and she finds a better match.
  5. More Sex - Accepts that her partner has different needs but she wants sex more often.
  6. One Night Stand – Satisfies the need to try something different, once.
  7. Fear of Aging - Feels less attractive and a new, possibly younger partner makes her feel younger.

More Love & Romance Links:
Affair-Proof Your Relationship

Reasons to Be Romantic
Romantic Things to Do in Small Spaces
Why Chocolate is Better than Sex
Over Do it for Your Lover

Everybody LOVES to win stuff.

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